Alternatives

[cybermule]

Plan X
My mum has a building society account with a passbook that absolutely nobody else can use. Once a week, her planned care package is scheduled to take her into town to pick up prescriptions, get her weekly budget and do her shopping with her, allowing her to get out and about in the world with a bit of support and visit a variety of shops. Her bills are all managed for her, and no excess of money is allowed to build up to attract thieving.

Plan 9
My mum has a debit card. Once a day, if she manages to remember her PIN, she staggers across the shop and buys vodka. Maybe a ready meal too. She has no fixed budget, so the money runs out frequently and bills don't get paid. If she needs more cash, or can't be bothered to get off the sofa, she gives her card and PIN to one of the local kids to fetch for her. Whenever she wants something from town, she has to phone a member of family to come and buy it for her.

Now, have a guess which of those is my idea, and which was cooked up by my mum and nan.

Comments

[eve-of-hades.livejournal.com]

First off, I'd like to point out what a brave person you are for having to deal with this.

Second, if that was me, I'd have put her in a home.

[cybermule.livejournal.com]

Thanks - I was starting to feel a bit nuts. I'd put her in a home in the blink of an eye - I'm just not allowed to.

[nyarbaggytep.livejournal.com]

Jeeeeeeeeeeez.
What can you do?

[cybermule.livejournal.com]

I know - I thought mine was the perfect solution. I'm sure it seems that way to everyone else bar two people on the planet. Unfortunately those two people are both vocal and aggressive :/

[nyarbaggytep.livejournal.com]

God, what a horrid thing to have to deal with.
You're always welcome to give me a call if you want to vent.

[surrey-sucks.livejournal.com]

Does your mom need all this care because of her drinking, or is it due to age and other health problems?

Why aren't you allowed to put her in a home?

[cybermule.livejournal.com]

She needs the care because of her drinking - she has got a mild case of arthritis, but is perfectly capable of walking well with a stick when she's not drunk. Problem is, it's exacerbated by drinking, and she's got a massive vitamin B deficiency which is making all her nerves and muscles malfunction. Other problem is, she and her mother are convinced she'll "never walk again" and that it's dangerous for her to try because she's an epileptic (i.e. she gets the DTs).

I can't put her in a home because she's only 55 - to get her compuslory care, I'd have to have her sectioned, but the mental health act over here doesn't allow you to get her sectioned if her main problem is drug or alcohol addiction. Sigh.