*baffled*

[cybermule]

OK - quick informal poll:

1. Who here orders specific Christmas gifts from at least one person? (e.g. "Honey, could I have a puppy for christmas")
2. Who is that from? Kids, parents, spouse, everyone?
3. Is this a good way of doing things in your opinion, or just a necessity?
4. Have you ever not bought someone a present rather than bought something for the sake of it?

Just interested - I seem out of step on this one. Will post something to make sense of it!

Comments

[belladonna-9.livejournal.com]

I ask everyone a I buy for if there is something specific they would like for Christmas.... its so much easier for both parties...

[psilobabe.livejournal.com]

i ask my brother what his kids want otherwise they could end up with lots of the same stuff :) this year i've asked thang to get me boots, as the soles on mine are coming off ;)

[casper-garlick.livejournal.com]

I only specify if I am asked by somebody what I would like. Although most of the time I can't think of anything I need/want so I just say 'nothing' which means I end up with stuff I really don't want. I hate Xmas. Bah.

[casper-garlick.livejournal.com]

Oops, forgot I was signed in as the cat LOL

[aras-55555.livejournal.com]

1. I only occasionally ask for something when I'm specifically asked what I'd want. I used to just say 'I don't know' or 'anything' but then you end up with something that's pretty lame, so I figure if the money is going to be spent, you might as well get something you like, so it's not that bad specifying what you'd want.

2. This is usually from older relatives.

3. I'm not really huge on 'surprises', so I think it's alright to request something, if you're asked. I do think gift-giving is pretty stressful, and I remember in the past when we had some larger family xmas gatherings, at least one year there was a 'no gifts for anyone except children' policy, which seemed to make things a lot more easy-going.

4. I usually don't buy things for anyone's birthday, or gifts to bring back from vacation, or whatever. I've found most of the time it's equally awkward whatever happens, so at least this way there's less stuff to carry around :P Which of course doesn't preclude buying something for someone if you find something really great that you know someone would want.

[sixtine.livejournal.com]

1&2&3. Sometimes I ask S for something specific. We ask and get asked about presents for our kids/our nephew & niece. It's much better to get things for the kids that they want; there's so much random tat out there (and most of it is in our dining room). There are also presents for the kids that I actively don't want. So, yes, it can be a good thing in some circumstances.
4. Yep. Every now and again my best friend gets a fantastic birthday or xmas present. Most of the time he gets nothing because I refuse to buy random tat to collect dust in his home.

[cleverkat.livejournal.com]

1. I don't demand anything specific from anyone for Christmas unless asked as to what I want. I then give some affordable examples of things I could use. I don't enjoy having people feel obligated to buy me things, so I never suggest items unless asked.

2. It's usually members of my family who ask me what I would like, mostly because I'm viewed as the "artsy weird agnostic one" in a family full of conservative Christians and they have no idea what I'm into. I suspect they think it's copious amounts of drugs and Satanism, but one can never be sure.

3. I honestly would just prefer people to stick to small things or homemade items. My family spends too much money on presents and trying to outdo each other, which makes things uncomfortable and devoid of meaning. I myself make cookies and breads for the holidays and while my own family (save two members) didn't eat any of it because I dared to use whole wheat flour and unrefined sugar, my boyfriend's family loved the baked goods and were appreciative. I do give small gifts to close friends and my boyfriend, but I'm more into surprising people than giving for a specific occasion.

4. Yes. Sometimes you just don't find the right gift, or people have limited space, or in the case of children, they have too many toys already. I also don't feel obligated to get a gift if I feel someone is being rude or demanding I buy them something. You know, the whole "Where's my present?" thing. My own sister did this one year and well, she ended up with no birthday gift. Heh.

[lengths.livejournal.com]

1. people who know me well know that I don't like asking for specific things but prefer surprises.

2. My dad does not know me very well and so its probably safest that he always asks what I would like.

3. I think it is a sensible option for people who you are attached to but don't actually know that well. Such as certain family members.

4. I have never not bought a gift. I wouldn't dare - My mother hit the roof when I neglected to send her a christmas card one year. (In my defense I had spent ages making her a scarf but that did nothing to placate her). If I were to miss a gift there is no telling what she would do. There is always the option of wine/chocolates. Very few people hate both.

having re-read that...

[lengths.livejournal.com]

I think I should make it clear that my comments only apply to those family members who would excommunicate me if I failed in my duty.
For people I am not duty bound to. I get presents for people if I see something I think they will like, or once in a blue moon if I remember their birthday.
My own son didn't get a christmas present from us until he was four. We decided that he wouldn't notice, and as his birthday was too close to christmas and childrens' needs change so much over a whole year, we would be better waiting and getting him what ever he was ready for at easter instead.