*oof*

[cybermule]

I'm bloody knackered! Spent the day fitting mum's new place up. Made the mistake of taking her with me - the first thing she did was collapse in the corner and apparate a bottle of vodka. She needs to get a fair amount down before noon to avoid seizures, so ignoring my killjoy suggestions of moderation, she made sure to drink quite a lot, just to be on the safe side.

I put her new futon thing together, with much help from mum, who is the self-acknowledged expert in all trades. If you've ever seen I, Claudius, think about the bit where Augustus is talking to Livia in the garden about how she's suddenly become a horticultural expert. That's my mum and dad. At one point she decided she could do far better and proceded to nearly shatter my thumb. Finally I got the sofa together, and mum admiringly remarked that it looked like garden furniture and there was no way she was ever going to use it.

She seemed to go back on this statement shortly after, when I'd put the sofa down as a weight while I cut the new carpet - after demanding/refusing dinner several times in quick succession, she promptly passed out on the reviled sofa and snored. Made a damn fine job of laying carpet, even if I say so myself. That'll probably due to my generous sacrifice of the first-born skin of several fingers to the lesser gods of the stanley knife :P There's a long reason for me laying a carpet that I'm not going into right now, suffice to say it ended up being the only way to persuade my mother to move house :P

She was teaching the sofa such a good lesson for being crap and garden-ish that I had trouble even persuading her to get up, but finally shovelled her into the car to much drunken devotion about how I was the beshtesht daughter ever. I'd intended to sort out a couple of odds and ends at her old flat before going down on Saturday to actually pack stuff into a van and move her. Found that mother had packed one small shoebox with wineglasses. This had taken her 8 days :p Decided to help her a bit with the packing. Opened the bedroom door to find it waist-deep in mouldering junk. Oh, and a cupboard half full of old sneakers. Literally.

Jesus fucking Christ on a bike - this is where I get my OCD for tidiness and my revulsion for stuff! Not really a novel revolution, more a massive reminder of a previously noted thought. Worked for an hour, picked up a pile of paperwork to do some time over the next few days and went home.


I think I might take a very hot bath, then spend the evening getting modestly wasted in front of the TV. I'm OK - this is just my way of getting cheap therapy by turning an annoying day into a sarcastic retelling :)

Comments

[kidkarrot.livejournal.com]

I remember sacrificing my first-born skin of three fingers to same damn veggie knife, always when I was cutting tomators. Any other veggies go smoothly. The disturbing thing is that it started with the thumb on my right hand and proceeded straight on down the fingers of that hand. So far, the ring shields stand fast, but there is no getting around the inevitable that tomatoes must be cut! :)

I should have had you put down the carpet in my house. ;)

[cybermule.livejournal.com]

I generally get along with knives, with the odd spectacular exception!

I should have had you put down the carpet in my house. ;)

Heheh - I was half contemplating setting up as a carpet-fitter - they were going to charge £30 for fitting it! I'll definitely be doing my own from now on.